<VV> English paper (un petite peu Corvair)

[Dennis Johnsey USN (ret)]

  This is the paper that's due for Eng. Comp. tommorrow.  The assignment was to write 600 words describing a process in the third person. It's called an informational narrative, or some such thing.
   
  D. Johnsey
  Eng. 1301
  6/4/08
   
  Restoring a Classic Car
      The painstaking process of restoring a rusting old vehicle to useable, if not pristine condition is an experience one should definitely seek to add to their resume', albeit perhaps under the heading of, "childish endeavors". 
   
      Even though occasionally frought with those episodes of anxiety and terrifying consequence which have all too often characterized man's history with his machinery, the feeling of pride that comes with completion and the admiring stares of fellow car enthusiasts is a pleasure to be enjoyed without the slightest tinge of guilt, being derived as it is from honest effort and personal sacrifice.
   
      As with many projects, one approaches the problem of restoration from the end, and plans backwards to determine the best way to get there. In doing so, they are able to avoid having to take things apart once they are together, thereby proceeding smoothly from start to finish, without unnecessarily repeating any step two or three times. For example, it makes sense to save painting the body and re-attaching chromework for last, in order to avoid damaging it while working on the suspension or drivetrain.
   
      Naturally, attending to rusty metal and dents -- involving the arts of welding, sheetmetal work, and possibly the application of an epoxy filler -- must preceed final painting. Because there is often rusted floorboards and kickpanels underneath the carpet, the sheetmetal and welding must sometimes be done before those areas are covered with carpet or trim.
   
      Following that same logic further, one can easily determine that the wiring is best installed before the interior, but sometimes after the welding, especially if routing of the harnesses takes them near rusted out areas which have to be cut out and replaced. Many times, the relative size or location of a system or part will determine the best order -- as in the case of the brake and fuel lines -- which often need to be installed only after the suspension systems are in their final position, to avoid damaging flimsy tubing while flailing about with awkward, heavy steel. 
   
      Oftentimes, even the engine and drivetrain are entwined with suspension components in such a way that the order of their assembly is dictated by their orientation to each other. For example, the removal of the engine and transmission in the rear of my '62 Chevrolet Corvair van is greatly facilitated by the prior removal of the rear axles, as is the removal/replacement of the rear springs and shocks.
   
      The engine and it's associated systems are by far the most complex chore, involving exacting measurements, careful attention to detail, and a high level of organization. Privacy, combined with the profligate application of the vernacular of a stevedore suffering with genital poison ivy, have invariably been determined to be singularly conducive to the the type of cathartic release most beneficial to the process, as well.
   
      If the engine has been sitting out in the weather for long, one would do well to assume that it may be frozen up with corrosion in the cylinders, and treat it with Marvel Mystery Oil poured into the spark plug holes, before trying to get it to turn over-- unless one plans to disassemble it anyway. According to all reasonable accounts, Marvel Mystery Oil is the high colonic of the internal combustion universe, having a veritable plethora of benefits that qualify it as the sole pretender to the throne of, "Nectar of the Automotive Gods."
   
      As always in the automotive world, an integral part of all these steps is the threefold cautions of safety, safety, safety -- in that one is dealing regularly with the unforgiving Newtonian tendencies of an elevated object of sufficient weight to turn one's eyeballs into deadly projectiles, should it land on their backside due to some unfortunate failure of equipment or consciousness. 
   
      And last but not least, one should always keep a fire extinguisher handy whenever any hydrocarbons are introduced, as the anecdotal evidence of man's one hundred year relationship with gasoline will readily attest. I know of one fellow who got burned so badly once while priming a carburetor, that he's considering petitioning the local crematorium for a discount. <<place rimshot here>>
   
      There can be no denying the long hours and late nights involved in the restoration of an old, rusty hulk; the dirty fingernails and the ruined clothing; but -- if one pays attention to details of order and organization, and does not ignore the obvious potential for injury -- when all is said and done, much will have been said about what one has done.
   
   
   
   
   
   
  Dennis Johnsey
  '62 Corvan